Be With Others Where They Are
You Can Extricate Yourself from the Matrix Even if Your Loved Ones are Still in it
A few people have asked me to address how to interact with close friends & family who are still entirely caught up in Matrix-consciousness. I have to admit, I have procrastinated tackling this very difficult subject matter. It’s so delicate. But I will try to offer something helpful – from real life experience.
You see, once the Matrix construct becomes so obviously clear, these is no more engaging in the status quo world.
As we ease on out of the Matrix we become more humble, more astounded by the power that mind-field had over us & absolutely determined never to be in such a position of subservience to an ideological construct ever again. We run for our lives, quite literally.
Then, there are our loved ones, made variously shocked, challenged, resentful or incapable of holding us in high esteem any longer because our new perspective feels strange and even crazy to them. They don’t get it. They don’t see it. Relationships that mean so much to us are threatened, which doesn’t seem fair or right. This threat is painful because the bonds we’ve forged with these individuals are real and took time, care to develop and are made of love.
We feel rejected for doing what we must. We don’t want to change anyone else’s mind but we do want to feel supported and loved despite owning our our own mind, at last!
As we increase our understanding of the Matrix and extract ourselves from the Matrix prison of mind-control programming, it doesn’t help to have people we love and care for challenging us at every turn.
Extricating oneself from the Matrix is hard enough without added obstacles like that.
Self-extraction from the Matrix is not for sissies. It’s really, really hard because we are inherently loving creatures, designed for connection and the last thing that emotionally-healthy people like to do is to separate from those they’ve built bonds with. So we have to find peace and equanimity on a path to freedom, which may require being rejected and isolated for a time from these beloved friends & family.
Of course, people who love you should strive to understand you and support your path/vision as much as you would strive to understand theirs. But your very perspective challenges their way of life, their thought process, their values. It is as hard on them as it is on you. They cannot get their heads around something that is clear as day for you and if they try to, they meet with a distressing cognitive dissonance. It’s hard for both parties. Both sides suffer.
So here’s what I would say. Be with them. Find common ground. Hold on to your beautiful, established bonds. They are so precious & valuable. Don’t let your path cause distress for either of you. Communicate your needs gently (as long as your needs are only in reference to yourself and not presuming what they need & watch that you never to try to convert them). Meanwhile, do not let them hold you back!
It takes meticulous witnessing of our emotions and fully-fledged responsibility for our emotions to maintain sacred relationships with those who don’t see what we see.
But here’s the most important thing: if we can see the Matrix and are in the midst of extracting ourselves but don’t have the emotional maturity to ‘check’ our feelings, reactions and desires, we will just wind up stuck in the Matrix via our shadow aspects and be delusional about our path to freedom. In other words, we might come to consciousness about the concept of the Matrix but remain ensnared within It because of a blindness to the patterns of our dysfunctional ego.
It’s a ‘mine-field’ getting out of the ‘mind-field.’
There are traps within traps as we strive to free ourselves from captivity. We have to stay super aware, meticulous in our steps and we must not take anything for granted. It’s not an easy extraction.
Be with others where they are. Receive each other. Hold space for each other.
All we can do is continue disentangling ourselves despite what others choose. Meanwhile give yourself all the space and allowance you need to do what you know is right.
For what it’s worth, most of us do this alone and have friends and family around us who don’t get it at all. Sometimes I think that’s part of the test, the initiation. Hard work. But the alternative is no alternative. Onward!
in loving service,